after a month anything with tits is on the radar
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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