Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
