She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
