She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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