@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
We have started to decorate penises.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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