Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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