We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
