I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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