just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
