I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
