Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
