He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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