Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
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