Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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