So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
