Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
