Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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