He asked to "fluff my boner.."
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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