I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
