week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
