I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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