That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
vagina is talking i cant
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Randomize
