Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
