Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
