I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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