dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
This is my gift to your gina
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Randomize
