How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
