My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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