Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
