D3 body, D1 cock
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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