This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
