he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
