My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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