Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
