Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize