So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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