so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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