Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
