He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize