Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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