We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
