Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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