Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
