it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
