I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
