So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize