just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize