I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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