"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize