So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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