i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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